In today’s video, I’m going to talk about how to get just about anything you want.

Read or watch below to discover how to get anything you want.

Zachary Stockill: In today’s video, I’m going to talk about how to get just about anything you want. And I mean, in terms of your relationships, your business, your work life, your personal life, just about anything you want.

I haven’t heard this equation anywhere else, but it seems to make sense. The equation is pretty simple: 

Seek to understand + provide as much value as you can = (almost) anything you want. 

This took me a really long time to internalize and understand. But I’ve seen it, for example, in my business on this channel, in the work that I do helping people overcome jealousy and possessiveness in their relationships. If I want to be the best in this field, I need to really understand my audience. 

How have I done that? I have read thousands of emails, I’ve had hundreds of coaching calls. I’ve also had all kinds of private conversations with friends and family. I’ve done all kinds of research; I’ve read every research study, every book on jealousy, and all the rest. I really have invested a tremendous amount of time, in seeking to understand.

The second part of that equation: I’ve tried to provide as much value as I can, and I will continue trying to provide it. 

So every YouTube video I make, I want to be really, really good. Every book I write, I try to make as good as I possibly can. 

Every online course… I want to hit this thing out of the park. I want to make this as concise and directed and actionable and valuable as I possibly can. 

And since I started doing those things, and devoting as much time as I could to seeking to understand and providing value, the impact that I’ve had in the world has skyrocketed. I am by no means a super big YouTuber with hundreds of thousands of followers and anything like that.

But in my little corner of the internet, helping people overcome jealousy and possessiveness and working one on one with men and women trying to let go of retroactive jealousy, jealousy, and possessiveness in relationships?

My impact has only grown the more that I’ve tried to follow this equation.

And to cite another personal example: I’m at the point now, where I get requests from people every day, people asking for my time, people asking for my attention. And back in the day, when my channel was very small, my blog was very small, I responded personally to as many of these people as I could. 

how to get anything you want

But today, that’s simply impossible because if I responded in-depth to every email, every coaching request I received, I would do literally nothing else all day. There’s simply not the time for it, unfortunately.

But I get requests from people quite a lot for free stuff. Sometimes, people will say, “I can’t afford your book, can you send me your book” Or, “I live in a poor country, can you please send me your book?” Things like that. 

And frequently in the past, I have responded to those requests with, “Here’s my book, it’s fine.” And you would be shocked at the number of people who haven’t even said thank you when they’ve received something from me for free. 

Now, why am I sharing this with you? 

Because if this person who is asking me for something for free, whether it’s free coaching, or a free book or whatever, if they had sought to understand me, they would realize I’m a busy guy. 

Number two, they would try to provide value. So maybe they can’t provide money, but they can at least say thank you. Or they can at least offer to write a review on Amazon, which is super valuable for me. Or they can at least offer to do maybe a video testimonial. Because the people who have invested the time in trying to understand me and provide value to me, I’ve offered the most value to in return. 

I’ve given them what they want. 

More often than not, I’ve given them free coaching. I’ve given them free books, and all the rest because they sought to understand me. I felt that, and they tried to provide whatever value they could, even if it wasn’t necessarily financial value. 

how to get anything you want

They’ve offered to write me testimonials on my website, they’ve offered to write a review of my book on Amazon, they’ve sought to understand, and they’ve tried to provide value. And in return, I’ve given them what they want.

You can apply this simple equation to so much in life, in your relationship life and your business life, in your personal life and your work life, whatever.

Seek to understand and provide as much value as you can. 

I believe the universe loves balance. The more value you offer to the world, the more you’ll receive in return. The more love you offer to the world in general, the more you’ll receive in return. And, the more praise and thanks and appreciation you offer the world in general, the more you’ll receive in return.

You can call it the balance. You can call it karma, you can call it anything you want. Seek to understand and provide value, and you will receive just about anything that you want. 

If you need help with retroactive jealousy, you can check out my online course. “The Overcoming Jealousy Blueprint” or consider applying for one-on-one coaching with me.

Zachary Stockill
Zachary Stockill

Hi! I'm a Canadian author and educator whose work has been featured in BBC News, BBC Radio 4, The Huffington Post, and many other publications. I'm the founder of, the author of Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy and The Overcoming Jealousy Workbook, and the host of Humans in Love podcast.