In today’s video, I share a conversation with Jacob, a retroactive jealousy sufferer and recent graduate of my online course, “Get Over Your Partner’s Past Fast.”
Read or watch below to hear Jacob’s remarkable story of beating retroactive jealousy.
Zachary: Once again, Jacob, thank you so much for doing this. I really appreciate it.
So, to get us started, could you tell me a little bit about where you were at with retroactive jealousy before investing in my course?
Jacob: Pretty similar to yourself. I think it was like, when I woke up in the morning, that was the first thing on my mind. And when I went to bed, it was the last thing on my mind. It was just intrusive thoughts…
I wanted to ask a million questions a day.
Yeah, it was just this relentless, like a voice in the back of my head, just obsessing, basically. Like, “Oh, what if my partner prefers her previous partner more than me? Or stuff like that?”
Really needed a lot of reassurance, which was not fair to her.
Zachary: What were some of the things that you tried to do on your own to solve this problem?
Jacob: Well, I started off trying to out-think it, which didn’t work. If anything, that made it a lot worse. Because I thought, like, oh, If I just push the thoughts away, or say, ‘don’t think,’ this will make it better.
If anything, that made it exponentially worse. I tried just exercising all the time. But as soon as I put the weights down at the gym and returned from my run, it would start again. And then I don’t know, I just tried to… I was basically just sleeping the whole time. So I wasn’t conscious to have the thoughts.
Zachary: Were you ever afraid that your relationship was going to end because of retroactive jealousy, specifically?
Jacob: Yeah, I thought that it was just too much. I was like, I can’t do this. I can’t deal with this.
Yeah, I was ready to throw in the towel. And I’m pretty sure if I hadn’t found your course that would have happened.
So, thankfully, I did.
Zachary: That’s great. That’s great to hear. So what finally made you take the leap of faith and decide to invest in the course?
Jacob: Well, I watched The Happy Hour Podcast clip with Alfie Indra. I saw that clip a couple of years ago and thought it would be awful to deal with. Because I’ve been avoiding relationships for various reasons.
And then I went back to watch that clip when your course was mentioned. And I was just like, it can’t make it any worse. You know, I want to do everything possible to get better. I knew that ending the relationship would be a temporary fix, because you know…
I’d go into my next relationship, and the same problems would probably pop up all over again.
I watched a few of your YouTube videos first. And they were like little tidbits that were really helping. And I just wanted… not a crash course, but just a well laid out plan where the order was clear. I kind of got all the information I needed in one place, I guess.
Zachary: Great. And how would you compare your feelings now to before you found my course?
Jacob: Oh, man. I want to wake up in the morning, I want to be around my girlfriend a lot more. Like, honestly, you mentioned the “jealousy scale”… I was at, like, a 10, like a hard 10. Now it’s like a three or four. And now it’s like I might get a thought a couple of times a day.
And I’m better equipped to deal with it. Like, instead of forcing it out. I use some of the techniques you mentioned.
Yeah, life is just better. I can be happy in a relationship instead of always being stressed like “I know another thought is coming,” even before they were coming.
I was stressing because I knew that they were going to be there, you know.
Life is just so much better. And the course definitely works. I saved my relationship, saved my mental state quite a lot as well. So yeah.
Zachary: That’s fantastic. I’m really glad to hear it.
And finally, Jacob, my last question for you. What is your message for other retroactive jealousy sufferers? And what would you tell anyone who’s on the fence about investing in my course?
Jacob: To answer the first question, my message is probably a few things. One, you’re not alone. If you’re watching this video, there are already two of us on this call that have suffered from this. And I’m sure there are thousands, if not tens of thousands of others out there suffering from it too.
But the other thing you can take away is that the two of us have gone from it being an everyday, all-consuming thing for me, to it’s almost totally not a problem.
So don’t be afraid to accept that within yourself and deal with it.
If you’re on the fence about investing in the course: if you want to be happy, just do it. It will help. I can almost promise it.
I had no hope at all. And I felt that I was just “stuck” with this for the rest of my life. And I took the course, and now I feel really good. I’m really happy in my relationship.
And if it can take someone like me, where… it was like, every couple minutes, I was having an intrusive thought or something. And it can take me down to like a ‘two’ or ‘three’ within less than a couple of months, then it can help anyone.