Get Over Your Partner’s Past: You Have The Retroactive Jealousy Cure

If you are a sufferer of retroactive jealousy and you’ve come across this site, chances are good that you have been searching (in vain) for a “cure.” If so, you’ve come to the right place. But I’m not going to offer you an “overnight retroactive jealousy cure” because there isn’t one. I’m not going to…

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Jealousy Telegraphs Insecurity

. A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. – Robert Heinlein. CONSIDER THIS QUESTION for a moment: if you were completely comfortable in your own skin, and completely confident about your abilities as a lover, would your partner’s past bother you so much? Almost certainly not. It was a humbling and…

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Give love and seek no reward

Continuing on the theme of last week’s post, I thought I might share this beautifully simple take on the meaning of life by the Russian concert pianist Andrei Gavrilov. I came across it a couple of years ago on Paulo Coelho’s blog, and it served me well during my darkest periods of retroactive jealousy. The…

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Watch this: "How to stop being jealous and ruining your relationship"

Although this video does not provide much direction in terms of “how to stop being jealous,” it does provide some great insight into the nature of jealousy, the emotional payoff of jealousy, and different ways of understanding it. The uploader — a YouTube user named “puppetcuttingstrings” — has a friendly, supportive, and positive attitude, and…

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Read this: “Another Jealous of my Girlfriend’s Past thread”

When I was jealous of my girlfriend’s past, I used to spend a lot of time browsing relationship advice forums in the vain hope of finding an “instant cure” for my retroactive jealousy. For reasons I will expand on in a future post, it doesn’t exist–there is no instant cure for retroactive jealousy. There are strategies,…

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John Lennon: Jealous Guy

When I was in the grips of retroactive jealousy, I used to take some comfort in this John Lennon classic: As were many of John’s songs, “Jealous Guy” was intensely personal: all indications suggest that the former Beatle struggled with jealousy in relationships for his entire adult life. John would incessantly question his wife Yoko…

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Book excerpt: "We are not who we think we are"

The following is an excerpt from my guidebook, Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy, which I will release exclusively on this site in April: . We are not who we think we are. . The most strongly enforced of all known taboos is the taboo against knowing who or what you really are behind the mask of your…

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Your Partner’s Past Doesn’t Matter… Unless It Does

Watch the video:   The following is an excerpt from my guidebook, Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy: A Guide to Getting Over Your Partner’s Past and Finding Peace. Click here to learn more. . There is nothing either good or bad, although thinking makes it so. – William Shakespeare. Sufferers of retroactive jealousy tend to have a…

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