In today’s video, I had a revealing and intimate discussion with Guy, a recent student in my flagship online course “Get Over Your Partner’s Past Fast,” sharing his retroactive jealousy course testimonial.
Zachary: Once again, Guy, thank you so much for joining me today. I really appreciate it. And secondly, just to kind of get the ball rolling, maybe you could tell me a little bit about your experience of retroactive jealousy? Where you were at with retroactive jealousy before you found me and my work, before you found my course?
Guy: I’ve probably been a sufferer since I was a teenager. I’m 53 now, and I don’t think I ever really understood it until I found literally by chance your stuff a little while ago, about six months. I’ve always recognized I had a bit of a problem, but I have definitely masked it over the years. And just thought it was just me. And I thought it was just jealousy, I guess, and insecurity and possessiveness.
But it came to hit me very hard. About three, four years ago,
I went through a divorce, started a new relationship, and all the demons came back but hit me like a train.
I mean, I really was hit hard by it. It’s completely dominated my last few years. And I was a bit desperate when I found what I found online and discovered your book, and I read your book in, in literally two sittings. And a lot of things fell into place. All of a sudden, I realized it wasn’t just me. I felt like there might be an outlet.
Zachary: And when things were really bad before you found my work, I mean, what were some of the things that you would do as a result of these feelings of retroactive jealousy? Like, how would you act out?
Guy: I would say 90% of it was internalizing it all and just really being very, very unhappy. Constantly bothered by feelings of frustration. And, and, I mean, you’ve sort of captured everything in mental movies. I used to maybe talk about it a bit with my partner, which was not a good thing because it doesn’t help. And I’ve come to realize that.
Zachary: Before you found my stuff, did you ever try anything else to solve this problem, like therapy or anything like that?
Guy: Yeah. So I tried counseling, which was a complete failure. I saw, for about 18 months, a clinical psychologist. And she was helpful. But even though I think I was pretty clear with my thought processes, she never recognized it as retroactive jealousy. And part of that is the person I was talking to didn’t fully understand me in the way that having a conversation with you, I think you would get it straight away.
Zachary: So what made you take the leap of faith and decide to finally sign up for my online course, “Get Over Your Partner’s Past Fast“?
Guy: Well, I read the book, and it was just like, the most brilliant teaser. So I had no choice but to keep going because I knew there was more in the locker and I need to get to the bottom of it. So yeah, I signed up straight away for the online course. And it was very interesting. Certainly, when I was having the sessions with my clinical psychologist, there were little bits of it that were in your online course. But there was a lot of new stuff that clearly or much more specifically deals with what I was suffering from, rather than a more generalized approach to perhaps some mental health shortcomings or weaknesses, however, you want to describe it.
So yeah, the online course has been good. I made so many notes, it was crazy. I’ve got them all on my phone. I read them again last night, most probably doing the online course two to three months ago, but made progress since then.
Because of a lot of what I wrote down I have reminded myself regularly of. It’s been important for me to reinforce some thought patterns and some of the actions that need to be taken to repair whatever business going on at that. I mean, I see a huge amount of parallels to your experiences that you’ve shared to what I’ve been through. And so just the confidence that it will get better, and I just need to keep working hard on it, it is something that I need to continue to do. All the tools are there, just going to keep reinforcing them.
Zachary: You mentioned that it’s been a private battle for you. I always really appreciate it when people like you are willing to speak about this issue. Why did you want to talk to me today? Why did you want to share this message and offer a testimonial for my retroactive jealousy course?
Guy: I suspect there are a lot of people out there who go through something like this, but don’t recognize it.
I suspect it massively impacts many more people than we’ll ever know. But as for me, for 30 odd years, I never had a label in the way that it now has. Therefore, I never thought I had anything really to work with. I just knew I wasn’t happy, I wasn’t coping very well at certain times of my life and in certain aspects of relationships.
So, you know, I’d like to help people, I don’t feel that I’ve done anything wrong. The first thing I wrote down after your online course was “It’s an imbalance in in my biochemical makeup. It’s happened for whatever reason, and I’ve got to now retrain the brain. I’ve got to rewire myself, and nobody can do it for me.” So what you provided me with are the best tools that I could find. I’ve just got to keep working on it. Through my testimonial for your retroactive jealousy course, I wanted to let people that know it works.
Zachary: And finally, Guy, what would you tell anyone who’s watching this who’s in the trenches with retroactive jealousy? Who might be “on the fence” about really committing to putting in the work to beat this for good, who’s on the fence about joining my online course?
Guy: I would do it. It’s an investment, you need to be happy. And the only way to find true happiness or rebuild your self-worth or rid yourself of insecurities,
All the things that you want to do, can do it with a bit of help. I don’t think, personally, even a clinical psychologist is well-equipped enough to be able to do what was necessary to get me right because I needed to feel there was an outlet, somebody, or a community of people that would be able to understand what I’m going through, not just bits of it. So I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend it. I think it’s been a huge game-changer for me.