In today’s video, I’m going to share what is possibly the #1 retroactive jealousy quote.

This retroactive jealousy quote is one of the most important things that I can tell anyone struggling with retroactive jealousy.

Transcript below

Zachary Stockill: There is a quote, which is commonly attributed to the American author, former navy SEAL, all around badass, a guy called Jocko Willink.

Jocko has a very, very good podcast, by the way. I highly recommend you look him up on YouTube, really good stuff.

Anyway, one of his most famous quotes is one that resonates with me and extremely relevant when it comes to dealing with retroactive jealousy.

And the retroactive jealousy quote is:

“Discipline equals freedom.”

Anyone who has taken my premium online course, “Get Over Your Partner’s Past Fast,” is well aware of the fact that I really emphasize discipline as a route to freedom from retroactive jealousy.

What do I mean by this?

Discipline to not fall into a victim mindset. Not to ask your partner more endless questions that don’t matter about their past. Discipline to not go snooping through their social media or through their phone.

Discipline to remain committed to personal development, remain committed to my online course. To a therapy regime or talking to a coach or whatever is working for you.

There is no substitute for discipline when you are working to overcome retroactive jealousy.

It is important for any retroactive jealousy sufferer to be aware of, is that I can’t be disciplined for you. Your partner can’t be disciplined for you, any coach or therapist or friend or parent or anyone.

No one can do the work for you and no one can help you remain disciplined except for you.

If the only way you can stay disciplined is to watch motivational videos on YouTube, or to have someone breathing down your neck all the time and making sure you’re doing the right thing, it’s a losing battle because. We’re all going to have moments when we feel weak. When we’re alone when we don’t have anyone looking out for us. When we don’t have anyone who’s got our back in any particular moment.

So ultimately, it’s up to us to remain disciplined with ourselves when we’re working to accomplish any goal in life and especially a goal like overcoming retroactive jealousy.

And it’s a really interesting little phrase, discipline and freedom, because when we think of the word discipline, we might not associate the word freedom with discipline.

When we think of discipline, we might think of guys in the military who really, on the face of it, don’t have a lot of freedom.

But the truth is, discipline is necessary to accomplish many of our goals in life as they relate to aspiring toward freedom.

For example, when I became very, very clear that I not only wanted but needed to overcome retroactive jealousy, when I thought about that goal, a huge word that came to mind and a real aspiration of mine was freedom.

Freedom from the obsessive mental movies and from the relentless curiosity. Freedom from the unwanted intrusive thoughts which used to haunt me night and day and from retroactive jealousy.

And what I discovered and I believe what you will discover as well if you’re serious about committing to this path, what I discovered is that discipline is really the only route to freedom from retroactive jealousy.

If you are looking for help overcoming retroactive jealousy…

I put together a comprehensive time-tested student-approved online course, which has liberated over 1,500 men and women from around the world from the shackles of retroactive jealousy.

If you’re interested in joining us, we’d love to have you. Click here to learn more.

Zachary Stockill
Zachary Stockill

Hi! I'm a Canadian author and educator whose work has been featured in BBC News, BBC Radio 4, The Huffington Post, and many other publications. I'm the founder of, the author of Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy and The Overcoming Jealousy Workbook, and the host of Humans in Love podcast.